Thursday, August 21, 2008

Bittersweet; Avery Saying; Family

What an adorable face this is! This was our dog, Dante. We got Dante pre-kids. You know, when you have infertility issues, you get a dog! Well, we WAAAAYYYYY spoiled him. I wish I had some of the old pics on my computer to show you. Dante would sit in a chair with us at the table as we played cards. No, he wouldn't play cards, but he would eat pretzels and drink wine with us....don't worry, only a sip. He's a great dog.

Well, then we were blessed with children. I think our first really did him in with his loudness, inability to pet easily, etc. etc. We could see Dante's personality start to change. It's like he was trying to say, "Hey! What happened to my family, and who is this little terror taking my place!" Imagine his dismay when we had a second....then a third! His world was rocked. Sad to say, he growl at the kids, but it was more like a "Get out of my space and quiet down" type growl. Some friends couldn't believe we still kept him. Sometimes I couldn't believe it, but I just couldn't give him up. If I really believed he'd hurt the kids, I would have in a heartbeat. Anywho, times have gotten worse for Dante. He has really bad skin allergies and started "leaking" pee everywhere. After spending a lot of money at the vet (twice), we found out he had a really bad urinary tract infection and was put on meds.

We decided we really weren't being fair to our first baby (Dante). The vet agreed that under our circumstances, he was greatly stressed. So, we listed him on Craigslist (if you haven't gotten on this "better than ebay site" you should try it). We noted our circumstances with the SN kiddos, and commented that he needed a stressfree home with no small children. Long story long, we had someone come look at him and wanted to take him. Jim called to tell me so I could come say good-bye, but I couldn't do it. So, I drove around until Jim told me he was gone. We've been able to email the new owners to find out how the transition went, because we wanted to make sure that if it didn't go well, we got him back. They love him! They even kept his name. I had Jim email them again to let them know he liked to 'sing', especially to "Happy Birthday."

Thus, the bittersweet moment. I miss him dearly, especially when I see all the pictures of him. How are the kids doing you ask? The don't even ask about him! I couldn't believe it. Neither Avery nor Ian even miss him! Probably a good thing. We won't be getting a new dog for quite some time.

Avery Saying: One morning Avery was jabbering stuff. She said, "Mama, I'm such a mess." I said, "You are? Then what am I going to do with you?" She sat and thought for a moment and replied, "Throw me in the trash." :) :)

Family: Do you ever get so frustrated with family that you just don't know what to do anymore? I know from some of your blogs, that you deal with the same thoughts. I recently did a Beth Moore Bible study that mentioned that unity among family is more difficult because you don't choose your family. You can choose your friends. Face it, how many of us would choose to be friends with people with have nothing in common with or have a difficult time being around? If you said, "Hey, I would" ....more power to you. But the study reminded me that God chooses our family, and He knows the complete story and all the why's. He calls me to persevere with family and do my best to rise to peace and unity....even when others do not and no matter how I am treated. It's a tough battle everyday. If we ask and seek, He even shows us amidst the issues, the areas in our own lives where we need to be humbled and where we need to be prayer warriors. Isn't He great.....even when we are not!?


Anonymous said...

Sorry about your pooch. That is rough.

love the Avery saying :)

I struggle with the whole family thing being adopted and all. If I had my biological I could see your viewpoint. But with a biological family failing...and then an adopted family failing it makes you question it. Maybe someday I can come to your wisdom.

Betsy said...

So sorry about your least you can take comfort in the fact that he is happy and kid-free! :) It's still hard, though!

Interesting that you talked about family issues today. Boy, do I have side of the family...and a lot of hurtful/stressful things have happened in the last 18 months from those who you would think would be most supportive of me and my situation. It's just about killed emtional reserves to begin with you know...I just keep praying and hoping for a miracle!

r_is_moody said...

I will miss Dante. I remember when you first got him and he kept biting my toes!!! But I'm sure he is a lot happier and he knows you still love him!!!

Paula Fasciano said...

awwwww...I'm so not a dog person, but your story made me sad...hope it was the right decision for you and your family.
I just said that today to my husband...about not being able to pick your family....we were talking on the phone and my mom was over and he just giggled when I told him that she was fixing a tear in a rug we have that he'd been promising to fix for weeks...she just got tired of it and sat down with her needle and thread and sewed it! Like we didn't fix it in her time frame so she had to do it herself!

TheXMom said...

I agree with what you said about family. I get frustrated with my husband more often than I should. I sometimes forget that when he gets home he has been working all day not out with the guys, and my throwing orders at him to help with the kids right away puts him in a grumpy mood making him not want to help at all.