A Lot of Grace Required

I hope I'm allowed more than one entry per day.

I've decided that people who have not been blessed with a child that teaches you even more than the 'typical' child, require a lot of grace. One day, you're being told, "Hey, you don't know what the future will hold. You don't know what your child will be able to do that you didn't think he/she could do. You don't know how God is going to bless you in all this. Etc., etc., etc. Then, if the mention of the possibility of another child comes in the picture, you're told, "What!? Why would you do that when you don't know what the future will hold for what you have now?" Hmmmmm, see the dilemma? I realize there is concern, but why should I be the only one looking to a bright future? Why can't everyone else as well? I have wonderful children, and while I do have plenty of days that I worry about what the future will hold for them and the things they may or may not miss out on, I also have days where I really am excited about what God has in store for us. My life verse (even before knowing I would have special needs kids) has always been Jeremiah 29:11-13. The Lord DOES know the plans He has for us. And we don't make decisions without asking Him for guidance first.

Okay, I know this is all rambling to you all because you have no idea what I'm talking about. BUT, I'm sure you've had circumstances that cause you to relate to what I'm saying. I just needed to get this off my chest. I just know I need a lot of grace for friends and family because they are NOT in our circumstance 24/7/365. I need to remember that, and not expect them to understand all our decisions as if they were. That's not fair to them. I shouldn't expect our decisions to be okay with others all the time (nor do we really worry too much about what others think when we make decisions for the betterment of OUR children), but is it too much to ask for others to respect our decisions, whether they agree or not? We will make mistakes and I realize this...we've made enough already. :) This is also where I need a lot of grace, because I too was once without children. Oooo, how the things we say can come back and haunt us!

Okay, I think I feel better now. These feelings actually came out of combined circumstances starting from about and year and 1/2 ago. Thanks for listening.....er, reading!

Tag

I'm not quite sure what a meme tag is, but sounds fun. I also got tagged by Fragile What? So, here goes.


The rules:
Write your own six word memoir.
Post it on your blog and include a visual illustration if you like.
Link to the person who tagged you in your post.
Tag six more blogs with links.
Don’t forget to leave a comment on the blogs you tagged inviting them to play along.


Wife, mother, friend; blessed with much!



I tagged:

Rian at A Day in the Life of a Moody Person

Becki at We Have Big Plans

Hidi Family

Party Time! And More

***She did it!!!!! My Avery pooped in the potty this morning! Yes, I may be a bit over the limit by putting a pic on the blog, but that's the kind of mom I am. :) I put her on the potty when she woke up this morning and as I was fixing her breakfast she hollered for me. As I got closer, she said, "I pooped." Well, how many times have a heard that before!? This time, no crying wolf. She stood up, and there it was, in all it's little bitty splendor! And no, I did not smell it to be sure it was poop. I trusted my eyes on this one. So starts the celebration. She got to write in her 'special' potty book, she got a 'special' sticker, and she got 5 M&M's. AND, of course, she wouldn't forget....she gets a party tonight. She'll go with Daddy when he gets home to go pick out her cake and icecream. When her daddy and aunt Zane called, she was very excited to tell them the news. Hopefully, this is the beginning of a continuing adventure!

***Update on Avery's trip to OKC. We picked Avery up at the 1/2 way mark on Saturday afternoon. She had a GREAT time with her aunt, uncle, and cousin. Her cousin has one of those big kid-size really moves Barbie jeep. Avery is normally afraid of it. She not only rode in the jeep, but she sat in the driver's seat and worked on driving it! My sister said she was well behaved and polite. And she got to show off her incredible hollow leg appetite. She's so tiny, you'd never believe how much she eats!

Letting Go is Hard to Do

Okay, all my children have at one time or another (actually several times) stayed the night at other places or with other people....my best friend and in-laws. Not too far a distance at all. Yesterday, I met my sister half way (she lives in another state) to have lunch with her and my niece, and to give her Avery to take back and stay a couple nights with them. There was something different about this time. I knew Avery would have tons of fun because she loves playing with my niece (5) and she loves her aunt and uncle. But my heart had a hard time letting her go that far away without me. I'm better now, but I was surprised at my feelings when putting her carseat in my sister's car.

I'm not one to normally check up on my kids a bunch when they're with someone else. I have friends who will call every 10 minutes to check up....nothing wrong with that.....I just don't do that. I've done well this time too. I called last night after they were in bed to see how she did, and I called 1st thing this morning to talk to her. She's doing great.

One of the reasons we did this was to give it a test for the summer time, when we'd like for her to stay a week (or shorter, if she misses home) there. It's really been tough for my sister and I to have our kids live far apart. It's hard enough for us to live far apart. We are only 13 months apart in age and our oldest kids are only a year apart in age. ( A lot of "aparts" there) I think Jim has a hard time understanding because his family all live within 15 minutes of us. It's great most of the time (there's still those 'in-law" moments every once in a while), but you know how it is.....just not the same as having MY family when I need them. I've gotten somewhat used it since I've been here since I was 18. OMG, that's 21 years now (as of next week when I hit my last 30-something birthday). I definitely don't think we could have made it (mostly emotionally) without my best friend and in-laws here. They do so great with our kids and love them so much. My best friend even takes them all on at once by herself! And she loves doing it!

So, with growth comes heartaches too. But they're the good kind of heartaches, if there's such a thing.

Heartbeat

We tend to take heartbeats for granted....unless you're waiting for one. I have a friend who has been trying to have a baby for 3 years. She's had 4 miscarriages and has not once heard a heartbeat....until today! I was blessed to be able to go with her and her husband to the RE doctor (her infertility specialist) for this baby's first sonogram. My friend, Rian, had a lot of fear going into it because the last time she went in for a first sonogram, there was no heartbeat. She had lost the sweet baby.

When we got into the room, I immediately got out my camera (actually, I took the first pic at her house this morning before we left). She's a scrapper, so she needed pics for the book, right? RIGHT! When I got the camera out at the office, she said, "Donna, don't act like a tourist." I ignored her. The doctor was kind enough to not be bothered by the pic taking. I think deep down, Rian is very glad pics are taken to remember this day! Right, Rian?

I was sooooo excited to see the smiles on their faces. We will continue to pray for the sustaining of this life and that his/her parents will experience the joy of holding and raising their first born child! I only wish I could be pregnant with her....oops, don't tell my husband I said that! hee hee

Doors

Ian has started this thing a few months ago about shutting doors. Well, it's more like slamming doors, but we're working on that part. Everytime I go around opening the doors to get ready for someone to come look at the house (up for sale), I turn around to notice Ian has shut them again. So, we usually get him packed up in the van to go, then I go back in the house and reopen all the doors. It's really kinda cute, cuz if I'm in the room, he'll go to shut the door and say "bye"....like he just now did. I'll go open it, he'll come close it, on and on and on. Watch, I just opened it without saying a word. Give him a minute and he'll be back to close it. Okay, not even a minute, it was 10 seconds. This time he left puppy with me...oh the joy! I'm going to open it again...15 seconds. Fun for hours!!

Vomit Alert

If you get queasy at the mention of vomit you might not want to read on. :)

My children fooled me again. Ian seemed so much better on Saturday. If you hadn't seem him Friday, you'd never know he looked near death. Today we went to church and he was still great. Then, after, at grandma's he puked. Then, at home, he puked....twice in one hour! And I'm talking liquidy (cause he hasn't eaten much food), projectile vomit. Once on me, then second on the floor.

Avery was so cute. She came up and said, "Mama, Ian vomited?" "Yes, Avery, Ian vomited." "Mama, Ian barfed?" "Yes, Avery, Ian barfed." "Mama, Ian puked?" "Yes, Avery, Ian puked." I think she just wanted to play thesaurus.

Avery came home with 102.4 temperature. She went straight down for a nap. When she got up, she and Ian went outside and played.

Benjamin is acting like he's going to get sick, but I hope not. He's not eating well and is a bit whiney. I'm hoping he's just faking me out.

Hmm, wonder what they will be like tomorrow!

Sick? Hmmmm

During the night the other night, Ian woke up (not a shock), but he was whining and had a fever. The next morning, he woke up a bit whiny and really lethargic, so I took his temp. It was 100.something. He looked not so good. After being up for maybe 2 hours, he wanted to go night-night again. A short time later he came out in the living room, waited for me to get to him, then vomited. He was really warm at this point. So I called the dr. and got him an appointment for around 3:00pm. Sure enough as the day went on, he started acting a little bit better. But I thought, "No, don't cancel the appointment. Just see what happens up til time to go." Well, by the time I got him to the dr., he looked really bad. When they took his temp, it was 103.6. She tried to look in his throat, but he wouldn't let her. She got a small peek and said it looked red. So, she was going to swab for strep. I warned her that he would throw up. The tech was supposed to come in with a towel or gown or something. Did she? Nope. I warned her. Sure enough, as soon as she tried to swab, VOMIT. The doctor thought it could either be strep or flu, but since she didn't want to take any chances in case it was strep, she went ahead and treated him for that with antibiotic. He was pitiful the rest of the day.

Okay, so this was just yesterday. We divied out Avery and Benjamin in hopes of keeping them from catching it....praise God for friends and fam. And today.....you'd never even know he was sick! I think a lot of it has to do with the other kids being gone. We've enjoyed him being so enjoyable today. We still want to keep the others gone, just to be on the safe side. Our luck, we would get them home and Ian would start vomiting again. I'm also glad Avery is able to be out having fun without having to share attention or getting hit from him all the time. I know in time, their relationship will change for the better. They really do love each other, but I also think they enjoy time away from each other. Who likes to share attention anyway?

I just love my children!

Disgust - a - What?

Puppy - Before

Puppy - After

Okay. I mentioned once before that I was going to blog about Ian's puppy. We have affectionately named this puppy Disgust-a-puppy. Just look at those before/after pics, and I'm sure you can figure out why. As you can see, it used to have two eyes and a mouth. I recently found the last eye on the floor.

After we weaned Ian from his pacifier at about age 2 1/2, he gained a greater love for his 'puppy'. The way he shows his love to puppy is to chew on him. Needless to say, we needed a game plan for when puppy needed a 'bath'. So, we bought another one. Simple enough. When puppy A was chewed on for a day or so, we'd wash it and get out puppy B. Problem solved. That lasted for a nice while. Then all of a sudden, Ian wouldn't have anything to do with puppy B. He would throw him, and keep saying, "puppy" until he got puppy A back.

Now, I have to work harder to stay on top of keeping puppy clean. If I forget to throw him in the washer while he is at school, it's all over for that day. The first thing he looks for when he gets home is puppy.

Both grandma's have done 'surgery' on puppy, but eventually the stitches come out. The big joke now is if Ian throws puppy at you. Basically the whole room says, "GRROSS!" Except Ian of course. He just can't see the grossness.

Maybe, hopefully soon, Ian will outgrow puppy, or start to grow to like his other one once again. Until then, puppy is just part of the family.

Feeling' Down

Yeah, so I'm not doin' too good today. Actually I haven't been for a while. I'm not sure what it is. I basically feel defeated. My body hurts (I've been dealing with back pain for a while), I'm tired, I'm frustrated....I'll just stop there. Yes, there are things I can probably do about each of those, but to be honest, I'm just not motivated. I'm putting on my happy face, trying to beat it all out of me, but it hasn't worked yet. I get up, pray that I will receive His strength and joy and gentleness, and that I would only seek His approval (which is funny because I already know I am marked with an "A" - approved, accepted, adopted - in His eyes). I make it for a little while, then I let the "go ahead, beat me up" take over. I'm usually tougher than this. Ian has been a bit louder and more hyper than usual. Maybe the added craziness is getting to me...I am a FX carrier after all. :) And although I'm surrounded by people who are very involved, I still feel very alone. Sounds crazy, I know, but I bet a lot of you moms can totally relate to that....even those with great husbands. It just happens sometimes.

So, my plan? I just got up. So before I get the kiddos up, I will go once again and seek the face of God. I've no doubt He has something sweet for me today.

Nine Words and Three Stickers

Saturday, Ian came into the kitchen as I was making his lunch. I guess he decided he wouldn't wait until it was ready to thank God. So, he folded his hands and clearly said, "Thank you God for Avery, Ben, Mommy, Daddy, today."

Yesterday he got 3 stickers for tee-teeing in the potty. Two of those times, he let me know he needed to go. He does this by walking around with his pants to his feet, trying to pull off his diaper.

Go Ian!